6/2/09 Replace-Mets Lose to some AAA team

Alan Alda was just signed to a minor league deal

 As the helicopter pulled away from Citi Field on route to Pittsburg, Jerry Manuel looked down at the infield and the remaining workers had spelled out “Goodbye” across the diamond. The players had been dropping like flies and although the wins came, the victories seemed marred by casualties. Hips, fingers, anal leakage, swine flu, knees… few were beyond harms way.




Pirate county is a desolate region. Once the land of proud warriors, it’s now littered with the inexperienced descendants of past glory. The walking wounded touched down and expected to take no prisoners, regardless of their broken bodies.


Fate was not on their side though as one by one the ranks started to dissipate. Word had it that even the reserve soldiers were going down at a rapid pace. It was not to be. What’s left of the Mets were left pantsless and toothless; embarrassed by the disaster they call the Pirates.


Notes from last night:

  • Yes, those were the Pirates and those were the Mets
  • The Pirates beat Johan Santana.  How am I supposed to wrap my brain around that one?
  • Carlos Beltran is still home with an IV in his arm, watching his soaps
  • Everyone either has a broken bone, the plague, muscles coming off the bone or a case of broken spirit
  • I’ve never seen someone as streaky as David Wright

I’d go over some details of the actual game, but if they’re not going to come to play, neither will I. It’s like going to a Picasso exhibit and critiquing his scribblings on newspaper. What’s the point? They’re on the verge of being swept by the Pirates… that’s all you need to know.


Posted By Nik Kolidas


7 responses to “6/2/09 Replace-Mets Lose to some AAA team

  1. When the backup to the backup shortstop gets hurt, you know you are in trouble. Instead of noting the starters who are hurt, how about we just note who isn’t? Who whatta thunk that Castillo would be one of the more healthy guys on the field – not me! How this team is 5 games over .500 is beyond me.

  2. to be honest, when the game started I found myself thinking the pirates lineup was not just better, but significantly better than the buffalo mets. Aside from wright andsheffield, did the mets have an edge at any position?

    I miss jose. Mets need to manufacture runs and he’s the best at that

  3. Btw nik, nice of you to mention that the opposing starter was zach duke who’s having an ace like year. If he was on any other team he’d probably have 6 or 7 years.

  4. He said at the bottom “that’s all you need to know” so why would he mention Duke?

  5. I didn’t think it mattered in the overall picture. Zack Duke isn’t Tom Seaver. I can’t get all gitty about him dominating the Bisons lineup.

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